This Does Not Look Good on the Republicans

Today on a gossip website - Oh No They Didn't - I saw pictures of John McCain's daughter Meghan hanging out with Heidi Montag of 'The Hills', an MTV reality show featuring vapid and fame-whorish blondes from LA.



A few months ago Heidi-from-the-Hills declared herself to be a Republican and therefore a McCain supporter. This was news, apparently; it was reported on numerous news outlets. McCain kept the ball rolling by saying publicly that he would watch every episode of the show in return for her support. I'm not sure why he would do this other than for the publicity. I don't think Heidi Montag is exactly the kind of voter he wants to market himself through. Sure, he's going for the youth vote, so hooking up with a star of an MTV reality show is wise. But Heidi Montag? The show's villain who is universally despised?

Fast forward to present day. Here is Heidi and the potential first-daughter lunching together, both wearing sky high heels and toting over sized purses, at the Ivy in Los Angeles. The Ivy, if you don't know, is a notorious paparazzi hang out and the best place to go if you wish to ensure your photo will be taken, no matter how b-level famous you are. What this tells me is one of two things. Either Heidi and Meghan are real true thick-as-thieves friends, and we've just missed out on knowing this and in turn this is the reason for her support of McCain, or, Heidi was contacted by the Republican party and asked to stage this photo-op to generate publicity for the campaign.

I must admit, either way, I'm kind of terrified of what the future of American politics will bring. Next, we'll see Cindy McCain lunching with Dina Lohan in New Jersey and John himself appearing on the Two Coreys.

Should political campaigning and fame-whoring be mutually exclusive? After all they are close relatives. And Barak Obama did get press due to his "relationship" with Scarlett Johansen.

Come to think of it, Barak has simply just chosen his youth message a little more carefully. While Scarlett and Heidi are both busty young blondes, one is famous for being a thinking actress who appears in serious films and records somewhat unsuccessful yet cool Tom Waits covers, while the other is famous for...wait, what is she famous for? I think it's for being a gossipy bitch, but I'm not sure, I don't watch the show.

In essence, this seems to sum up, quite well in fact, the difference betwixt the two candidates, doesn't it? Lets hope the youth of America vote Scarlett over Heidi on this one.

See all the pictures here.

Fashionably Unfashionable

Hipsters. Club kids. Club hipster kids….I’m not quite sure what the variety of hipster to which I refer is called. Do they call themselves something? Perhaps they are so individualistic, they don’t have a collective name. It’s a shame really. Clearly I’m not a part of it, or I would know.

Here is what I do know, about this new genre of trendy character.

1. They seem to like American Apparel . A lot.
2. They like to ironically (I think) recycle fashion from the late 80s and early 90s
3. The worse it flatters your figure, the better.
4. If at the time it went out of fashion there was a collective sigh of “never again!” they will recycle it and wear it.
5. It must be terribly contrived and show the amount of effort involved.

Below are some examples of the exact variety of hipster to which I refer. If this is not good enough, I suggest going to Circa Nightclub in Toronto for one night, you'll have all the reference you need.


















My question is, and perhaps this is a dumb question that in turn shows my age; what exact point does this fashion style have? I guess that leads to the greater question: Does fashion have to have a point? Perhaps this genre’s style is that it has no point. How very dada. I mean, if that is the point, that there is no point, I’ll be pleasantly surprised. Is this what the youth of today have achieved? A collective distaste for genre to the point that genre bending is the new genre?

We all know fashion movements are touted by the youth as a way to express their individuality. Of course anyone over the age of 25 has realized that dressing the same way as a bunch of other people expressing their individuality really doesn’t result in you looking very individual at all. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, I mean, maybe you just want to fit in somewhere different than you normally do. Like Goths, or Punks. Sure, they look different than the mainstream, but they are also carefully placed within a counter culture slot that is definable.

What I am getting at is that for some reason this particular brand of individualism seems rather contrived to me. Each outfit I see on Facehunter (a style bible to this set) seems anything but effortless. Isn’t looking cool all about looking like you didn’t try? Maybe I missed a memo sent out in 2005 that said looking cool is all about trying hard these days. Maybe this is all about expressing outwardly how geeky you are inside. Maybe geeky is the new cool. I don't know. But it doesn't seem effortless.

Besides paying attention to youth trends for work, I am also paying attention because sometimes you’ll see someone walking down the street, dressed in a way that sure seems like they are one of these hipsters. Then they turn to face you, and it’s actually a crackhead who is just still dressed this way, having not bought new clothes since 1991.

I don’t know about the kids, but I generally try and avoid dressing in anything that might get me mistaken for a 42 year old crackhead.

Internet Crash = Hulk Smash

My internet access has been down all week.

I can't believe how much it has bothered me. I've gotten to be equal parts angry, frustrated, annoyed and isolated. It's still not 'up', this is just a temporary fix. It's so bothersome.

Why I'm mentioning it - other than excusing my lack of posts - is it got me to thinking: What if the internet, the entire thing went down for a week?

I have visions of male office workers pouring out onto the streets, ties pulled loose, shirts untucked, guffawing loudly. Women with high heels in hand, wobbling on tired feet, feeling liberated from office boredom, looking for a glass of chardonnay. I see tweens, freaking the f*ck out, trying desperately to use their mobile phones to 'facebook' eachother. There I am, frantically trying to find somewhere, anywhere, where I can see the latest Britney Spears photos.

Its funny how we get so used to the conveniences we have, and the thought of them being taken away is too terrible to comprehend. What did people used to do when they got a flat tire, before cellphones? How did friends keep in touch when one was overseas teaching english, before facebook? How on earth did we get directions to a location before googlemaps?

Life these days seems to be about reversing these conveniences to reasonable levels; we want local foods instead of mangos in february, we are thinking about taking our bicycle instead of the car.

What would happen if the internet went away forever?
Could we ever go back to how things were?